If you are in the area, please feel free to attend!
Book signing on April 9th at Desert Camp Community Center from 10 am - 12 pm. I will be discussing the book, as well as signing copies ($12.95 available for purchase).
Click here for more information
Hope to see you there!
Ever since the book came out, I've received feedback about how it's made women think about friendships throughout their lives, as well as who is in their lives now. The goal of this blog is to open up and create a dialogue about friendships: the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Each week I will post my thoughts, experiences, as well as various articles, topics or quotes that I feel are important when examining female friendships. Please feel free to leave comments; I look forward to hearing from you!
Email me: survivingfemalefriendships@gmail.com
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Friday, April 5, 2013
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
My...How Communication Has Changed!
Now that I've joined the world of Twitter (@ZangaraNicole),
I'm noticing (and learning) a lot about how we communicate and share
information. First of all, when something happens, one must take time to
post it on Facebook, write a tweet, put it on Instagram and/or link it
to one's blog. Oh, plus send out an email, text message and possibly
make a phone call (but who does that anymore?!). Is this how we're
communicating? It's exhausting!
Add to these several modes of communication, Twitter only allows you to tweet 140 characters, so you're limited in what you can write...which for some people, may be a good thing (you know who I'm talkin' about). What I have noticed on Twitter is that some of the tweets are filled with so many hashtags and/or shortened words, that I'm left feeling puzzled about what the tweet is about in the first place! Am I the only one?! And what is a hashtag? I seem to not fully understand Twitter - maybe I'm Twitter-challenged...
It seems we are communicating through all of these sources instead of just having one source. Remember calling someone and that being the only other form of communication besides seeing this person? I remember those days! Now I feel as if I'm trying to keep up or else I'll miss something. I can only imagine how my parents and their friends feel about the constant changing of technology. Or am I just getting old? Wait, don't answer that.
In addition, many of us are so connected to our mobile device that we're staring at that all day, instead of having real-time person to person interaction. Rather than saying, "I laughed so much last night at so and so's party," we're saying, "Your Facebook post was hysterical!" What happened to simple communication between two people instead of between everyone, including your mother and probably your third cousin. It feels chaotic to me.
In all seriousness, I'm starting to wonder how technology and social media are impacting the younger generations and their friendships. Can we truly get to know our friends through Twitter and Facebook? Is that the direction we're going - most of our communication/interaction is going to be through social media?
I believe our friendships are being affected by social media. I also believe that there are both positive and negative impacts; on one hand, we are able to connect faster and in an easier way through social media. We can share information in a matter of seconds to a great number of people. On the other hand, it seems that quality is being substituted for quantity - how many friends one has on Facebook or how many followers one has on Twitter - and so I wonder about the impact this all has on friendships. Many people would rather share exciting news through Twitter than call a friend - yes, it saves time, but our are friendships suffering due to easier ways of connecting?
What are your thoughts? If you're a Twitter/Facebook/Instagram user, how often are you on it? Is that how you keep up with your friends? How have these modes of communication impacted your friendships?
Add to these several modes of communication, Twitter only allows you to tweet 140 characters, so you're limited in what you can write...which for some people, may be a good thing (you know who I'm talkin' about). What I have noticed on Twitter is that some of the tweets are filled with so many hashtags and/or shortened words, that I'm left feeling puzzled about what the tweet is about in the first place! Am I the only one?! And what is a hashtag? I seem to not fully understand Twitter - maybe I'm Twitter-challenged...
It seems we are communicating through all of these sources instead of just having one source. Remember calling someone and that being the only other form of communication besides seeing this person? I remember those days! Now I feel as if I'm trying to keep up or else I'll miss something. I can only imagine how my parents and their friends feel about the constant changing of technology. Or am I just getting old? Wait, don't answer that.
In addition, many of us are so connected to our mobile device that we're staring at that all day, instead of having real-time person to person interaction. Rather than saying, "I laughed so much last night at so and so's party," we're saying, "Your Facebook post was hysterical!" What happened to simple communication between two people instead of between everyone, including your mother and probably your third cousin. It feels chaotic to me.
In all seriousness, I'm starting to wonder how technology and social media are impacting the younger generations and their friendships. Can we truly get to know our friends through Twitter and Facebook? Is that the direction we're going - most of our communication/interaction is going to be through social media?
I believe our friendships are being affected by social media. I also believe that there are both positive and negative impacts; on one hand, we are able to connect faster and in an easier way through social media. We can share information in a matter of seconds to a great number of people. On the other hand, it seems that quality is being substituted for quantity - how many friends one has on Facebook or how many followers one has on Twitter - and so I wonder about the impact this all has on friendships. Many people would rather share exciting news through Twitter than call a friend - yes, it saves time, but our are friendships suffering due to easier ways of connecting?
What are your thoughts? If you're a Twitter/Facebook/Instagram user, how often are you on it? Is that how you keep up with your friends? How have these modes of communication impacted your friendships?
Monday, March 25, 2013
Cosmopolitan Magazine!
So there's this magazine, called Cosmopolitan...have you heard of it?! I'm sure you have! I'm thrilled to share an article on frenemies that I was interviewed for; it appeared in the online version of Cosmopolitan: cosmo.com!
For those of you who are confused: friend + enemy = frenemy. Unfortunately, we all have them, and many of us have come across situations in which we don't know how to manage - from how to handle a frenemy being way too nice to when she starts dating an old flame of ours...yikes!
Thus, I was asked to offer my expertise on how to handle eight common scenarios (cool, huh?!). If you haven't noticed, I'm excited and honored to share this article - being a Cosmopolitan fan and all! And for those of you who haven't read my book, I address the topic of frenemies...and much, much more!
Check it out:
Cosmo.com article on frenemies by Natasha Burton
What's been your experience with frenemies? If you've been in these above mentioned situations, how did you manage them?
For those of you who are confused: friend + enemy = frenemy. Unfortunately, we all have them, and many of us have come across situations in which we don't know how to manage - from how to handle a frenemy being way too nice to when she starts dating an old flame of ours...yikes!
Thus, I was asked to offer my expertise on how to handle eight common scenarios (cool, huh?!). If you haven't noticed, I'm excited and honored to share this article - being a Cosmopolitan fan and all! And for those of you who haven't read my book, I address the topic of frenemies...and much, much more!
Check it out:
Cosmo.com article on frenemies by Natasha Burton
What's been your experience with frenemies? If you've been in these above mentioned situations, how did you manage them?
Monday, March 18, 2013
Author's Luncheon
I was given an exciting opportunity last Tuesday to attend an author's
luncheon at the Silverleaf Club in Scottsdale, AZ where I discussed the book
with about 15 women. Questions ranged from how to handle the changing nature of friendships
as we get older to how to model healthy relationships to our
daughters; the questions sparked interesting conversations and topics
about female friendship.
What I enjoyed most about the afternoon was watching these women interact. Many of the women came with a few friends, so they looked happy as they were laughing and catching up with each other. One of the women brought her friend from out of town who is currently staying with her, and they discussed their 40+ years of friendship history. It was beautiful and heartwarming to witness these real-life friendships, and ones that seemed to pick up without a hitch.
Another interesting part of the luncheon was when a woman asked about how to handle those friends who drain you, and don't get the hint that the friendship isn't working. This woman coined the term "emotional vampires" - which I absolutely loved and had to share such a funny, yet true term. She mentioned how these emotional vampires suck the life right out of you. It's a hard dance when someone doesn't seem to "get it" and keeps contacting you - or she always has drama and chaos that weighs down the friendship. I offered my feedback, and some of the other women provided their insight; yet everyone agreed that it's not easy to be honest and tell someone that the friendship is over and/or it's not working. This led to a discussion about friendship breakups, and how difficult and painful they are for both parties.
Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed the luncheon and want to thank the women who attended, as well as those who helped to make it happen. It was wonderful to discuss the book - as it created a dialogue about various friendship experiences - and yes, Facebook was discussed and even these women shared their frustrations with it! The best part was witnessing the beauty of female friendship and seeing how it can last.
What I enjoyed most about the afternoon was watching these women interact. Many of the women came with a few friends, so they looked happy as they were laughing and catching up with each other. One of the women brought her friend from out of town who is currently staying with her, and they discussed their 40+ years of friendship history. It was beautiful and heartwarming to witness these real-life friendships, and ones that seemed to pick up without a hitch.
Another interesting part of the luncheon was when a woman asked about how to handle those friends who drain you, and don't get the hint that the friendship isn't working. This woman coined the term "emotional vampires" - which I absolutely loved and had to share such a funny, yet true term. She mentioned how these emotional vampires suck the life right out of you. It's a hard dance when someone doesn't seem to "get it" and keeps contacting you - or she always has drama and chaos that weighs down the friendship. I offered my feedback, and some of the other women provided their insight; yet everyone agreed that it's not easy to be honest and tell someone that the friendship is over and/or it's not working. This led to a discussion about friendship breakups, and how difficult and painful they are for both parties.
Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed the luncheon and want to thank the women who attended, as well as those who helped to make it happen. It was wonderful to discuss the book - as it created a dialogue about various friendship experiences - and yes, Facebook was discussed and even these women shared their frustrations with it! The best part was witnessing the beauty of female friendship and seeing how it can last.
Friday, March 15, 2013
Alumni Article
I'm happy to share an article written by Patricia Rabb:
American University Alumni article on Surviving Female Friendships: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly
Check it out!
Thanks, Patricia!
American University Alumni article on Surviving Female Friendships: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly
Check it out!
Thanks, Patricia!
Monday, March 11, 2013
Facebook Unfriending
Another interesting article on Facebook: unfriending and the consequences of doing so.
The Huffington Post: Unfriending On Facebook May Affect Real-Life Relationships
I address de-friending in my book, so this research makes it even more clear that it can have a negative impact. My love/hate relationship with Facebook continues...
What are your thoughts? Have you experienced any negative consequences after deleting a friend from your Facebook list?
The Huffington Post: Unfriending On Facebook May Affect Real-Life Relationships
I address de-friending in my book, so this research makes it even more clear that it can have a negative impact. My love/hate relationship with Facebook continues...
What are your thoughts? Have you experienced any negative consequences after deleting a friend from your Facebook list?
Monday, March 4, 2013
Do You Need a Facebook Vacation?
For those of you who have read my book, you know I have mixed
feelings about Facebook - and that's putting it nicely! I have a
love/hate relationship with Facebook, so when I saw this article, I had to share it:
San Francisco Chronicle article on Facebook
San Francisco Chronicle article on Facebook
In the past year, has your Facebook activity increased or
decreased? If it's decreased, why? Do you ever feel as though you need
a Facebook vacation?
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