As you know, Mother's Day is coming up. I adore and respect my Mom and feel that as I grew older, she naturally went from being my Mom to my friend. Good job, Mom!
It's important to value your Mom, as she probably taught you a few things along the way about female friendship and the various roles women can play in our lives.
Thus, here's an article on female friendship which was written before last year's Mother's Day, but I feel it's still relevant today:
10 Reasons Women Should Value Their Female Friendships by Jennifer S. White
Below are the 10 reasons from the article:
"1. No one knows you like a girlfriend. Those
embarrassing moments, those hard-to-recreate experiences of
hilarity—your girlfriends know more about you than you’d like to admit
to a judge and jury under oath. How special is that?
2. Only another woman can understand. There are a
plethora of life occurrences that only another female will get. Don’t
get me wrong, a good man will try (thanks, honey), but no matter how
much effort he puts in, he cannot understand everything you go through.
You know who can? Your girlfriends.
3. Wisdom. I’m also extremely fortunate to have
been blessed with a wise mother. I’m aware that not everyone can say
this. I know that I’m fortunate, but, let me tell you, being able to
walk through life’s journey with someone who always (and I mean always)
sees the pieces that I’m missing is enough to make me thank my lucky
stars—and my mom.
4. Pedicures. Okay, this one might seem
comparatively shallow (or at least, some of the commentors from one of
my recent blogs would say this). However, there’s something purely
relaxing and wonderful about sitting in a massage chair next to one of
your best pals, delighting in something as basic as having pretty toes.
(Yes, I’m aware that this could definitely be done with a man too,
especially since one of my favorite movie scenes ever is Bernie Mac
getting a pedicure in Bad Santa.) Let the negative feedback roll in, I’m
sticking to my guns on this one—pedicures rock.
5. Evolution. I can see the evolution of my own
self by looking at the friends I’ve chosen at various points in my life.
At the same time, some of my closest female relationships have been
around since I was born, or shortly after. Surely, these relationships
are special and worth investing in. Likewise, rather than viewing
out-grown alliances as a waste of time or something to lament, try
looking at them as learning experiences and simple opportunities to see
how far you’ve come.
6. Fun. There’s a reason that “girls night out”
has a connotation of joie de vivre—women are a blast, plain and simple.
All women every where need to have the occasional girls night out—or
they should if they want more laughter and joy brought into their lives
and souls.
7. Sharing. No, I’m not only referring to
sharing clothing or make-up (although, truth be told, that’s great too).
The stereotype that women are better communicators is not necessarily
spot-on, but I really do think there is truth to the notion that women
share more—and bare more—in our relationships than many of our male
counterparts; and, speaking from personal experience, sharing words,
thoughts and affection with my girls is enriching to my life on more
levels then I can name.
8. Beauty is ageless. Cheesy, but absolutely
true is that beauty is timeless. Some women actually do grow more
physically beautiful as they age, but I’m not talking about this. As
women grow older, there’s a certain confidence, radiance, and authentic
inner light that dazzles. Wrinkles be damned, I can’t wait to get older.
9. Not all women are b*tches. Women have a bad
rap as being catty and nasty to each other. Unfortunately, you’ll be
able to find examples of this almost anywhere you look. Still, I think
this is like most groups in life—the loudest, most annoying participants
often get heard, but this doesn’t make them the majority or the most
important. Without a shadow of a doubt, I know that there are women who
don’t judge each other harshly, who appreciate and lift up other ladies
instead of dragging them down, and who possess the sort of
self-acceptance that allows them to seek out other successful women; I
know this because I am one. Believe what you want, but there are plenty
of women out there who adore others of their sex—and who have no desire
to tear them to bits.
10. We’ll likely be around for awhile. There’s a
scene in Sex and the City where it’s mentioned that female friendships
are important because, in the end, it’s just us anyways. Now, I know
that I need my husband to stick around forever, and I’m certainly not
putting too much stock into this sad thought. Regardless, girls, try to
remember that your female friendships are important to maintain.
Children grow up and husbands need their own space too. Don’t be a
martyr. Put energy into your friendships."
Good reasons, huh?! It's extremely important to be grateful for your friends, to acknowledge their strengths, and to realize it takes time, energy and effort to maintain a friendship...because in the end, it's all worth it.
What do you think? Do you agree with the above reasons?
For all of the Mothers out there:
Ever since the book came out, I've received feedback about how it's made women think about friendships throughout their lives, as well as who is in their lives now. The goal of this blog is to open up and create a dialogue about friendships: the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Each week I will post my thoughts, experiences, as well as various articles, topics or quotes that I feel are important when examining female friendships. Please feel free to leave comments; I look forward to hearing from you!
Email me: survivingfemalefriendships@gmail.com
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