Ever since the book came out, I've received feedback about how it's made women think about friendships throughout their lives, as well as who is in their lives now. The goal of this blog is to open up and create a dialogue about friendships: the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Each week I will post my thoughts, experiences, as well as various articles, topics or quotes that I feel are important when examining female friendships. Please feel free to leave comments; I look forward to hearing from you!

Email me: survivingfemalefriendships@gmail.com

Follow me on Twitter: @ZangaraNicole

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Playing House

I was bored one Sunday (which rarely happens, BTW) and decided to view the selection of movies and programs On Demand.  I came across Playing House and was hooked right from the first episode.  The friendship is realistically portrayed and the show is quite funny...actually, very funny.   

The main characters, Maggie and Emma, are best friends from childhood.  Maggie is pregnant and finds out that her husband has been doing some naughty things online with a German woman; Emma is a workaholic who was living in China, but after flying in for the baby shower, decides to stay to help Maggie raise the baby.

The first season focuses on Maggie preparing for the baby, as well as trying to deal with the marriage breakup.  Emma is having to face people and situations she left many years ago, including her mother and ex-boyfriend, and is figuring out her life now that she's back home.  We also see how Maggie and Emma manage their friendship now that they're living together as adults.  (I'd recommend watching the "Totes Kewl" episode, as it hysterically deals with what happens when friends have the same crush and are not honest about it).

In a recent article called Playing House: Finally, a TV Show Gets Female Friendships Right, Julie Beck writes:
"Though watching such friends together can be alienating when you don’t get their references, Playing House does a good job of inviting us into Maggie and Emma’s friendship. We see its flaws as well as its virtues. They reminisce a little too fondly about mean things they did in high school, they gang up on Mark’s wife, they pick at old sore spots from the old fights and misunderstandings that never quite resolved themselves: You work too much; you dreamed too small. Like any important relationship, friendship takes effort."

So, after spending the entire day watching the first season, I'm keeping my fingers crossed that USA renews it for a second one...pretty please, USA?!

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

More Articles to Share

I'm thrilled to share two more articles I was interviewed for.  One is on the pros and cons of mommy cliques, and how to cope with them.  The other is on some of the friendship changes that take place in your mid 20s, and how to manage them.

Mommy Cliques by Lucy Adams

An excerpt:
"When functioning well, however, mom groups lighten life’s load. Securing a circle of support can be critical to a woman’s well-being. A group of women with a common tie makes a great sounding board for each other when working out solutions to problems. The group is a safe place to vent frustrations and receive encouragement. Group members bring out the best in each other. They cheer on successes, and when crisis strikes they arrive with casseroles. A strong clique of female friends provides a sense of place and belonging in a world in which families are far-flung from their roots."

Why Friendship Changes In Your Mid20s by Danielle Page

An excerpt:
"Expectations change. According to Nicole, all friendships come with expectations — expectations that our friend will show up when we schedule plans, expectations that our friend will call us back when she had to take another call, etc. It’s not unusual for expectations to change as you become busier and have more responsibilities. Maybe your friend can’t spend as much time with you, or isn’t there for you during a difficult time due to her own busy schedule, so you have to shift your expectations of this friend.
 
It’s important to acknowledge that one friend can’t do everything or be everything. Learn to honor your friendship’s limits, and to appreciate what your friend does do."

Enjoy!

Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Town Vibe Fairfield Magazine Article

I'm excited to share an article I was interviewed for in the July/August 2014 print issue of Town Vibe Fairfield Magazine:
From Cheerios to Cocktails by Eileen Weber

Enjoy!

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Male Friendships

As you all know, I focus on female friendships in the book and on this blog.  What about male friendships, you ask?!  Back in December 2013, there was a segment on "CBS This Morning" that explored the difficulty of male friendships, how it impacts their health, as well as similarity/differences between male and female friendships.

Some fascinating facts from the clip in terms of the similarity between male and female friendships: 1. men also have a challenging time making friends, and 2. men look for similar qualities in friends, such as someone they can trust and is dependable.  Interesting, huh?!

Take a look:


What do you think about the findings of the research?  Do you agree or disagree?

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

YouBeauty.com Article

I'm excited to share an article I was interviewed for:
How Gossip Can Be Good For You (If You Do It Right) by Dinsa Sachan

It's an interesting topic, especially because when we think of the word "gossip" we think of someone talking negatively about someone else.  However, this article puts a positive and creative spin on it.

An excerpt from the article:
"While people think of gossip as spiteful and unproductive, experts believe it can have great emotional benefits. "When friends come together, gossiping can help with bonding," explains Christine Weber, Ph.D., a Long Island, New York-based clinical psychologist. "It forms closer relationships with friends who share the same values, activities and interests."

Gossip can also boost social support where you didn’t expect it, says Nicole Zangara, a licensed clinical social worker and author of “Surviving Female Friendships: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.” “When we learn information about a friend that we might not have known because they felt ashamed to tell us themselves—for example, they were recently diagnosed with a disease or are going through a separation—we can then reach out and be there for them.”'

Thus, Dinsa provides some tips on how to gossip the right way, which includes being smart about who you're gossiping with, as well as knowing when not to gossip.  

What are your thoughts?  Are you someone who likes to gossip?  Do you view gossip as a good or bad thing?