Ever since the book came out, I've received feedback about how it's made women think about friendships throughout their lives, as well as who is in their lives now. The goal of this blog is to open up and create a dialogue about friendships: the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Each week I will post my thoughts, experiences, as well as various articles, topics or quotes that I feel are important when examining female friendships. Please feel free to leave comments; I look forward to hearing from you!

Email me: survivingfemalefriendships@gmail.com

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Thursday, July 26, 2012

Can You Hear Me Now?

We all know that in any type of relationship, communication is key; we express ourselves through verbal and non-verbal communication.  When there is a misunderstanding – or miscommunication – it can lead to confusion, hurt feelings or worse, a break in the friendship.

I recently had an experience where something I said was not understood the way I intended, and thus, I had to clarify.  I was puzzled about how the other person took my words, but it made me look at how I communicate.  This experience also made me think about the many daily interactions we have with our friends, and how easy it is to miscommunicate.

Think about it – someone takes what you say, and perceives it as totally opposite from what you meant.  Both of you then leave the conversation with two separate understandings.  What we say, how we say it, and how it is perceived by the other person are all things we’re not always aware of when talking with our best friend.  We become so comfortable with each other that we forget this happens – plus, our best friend should know what we meant, right?!  Not always.  Thus, when there is miscommunication or a misunderstanding, we’re reminded how easy it is for these things to happen.

Sometimes there are certain situations in which we’re too timid to clarify – maybe we’re just getting to know someone and fear being seen as “stupid” or we’re afraid to clarify because we feel we should know what our friend is talking about.  Again, that word: Fear (which I discuss in the book).

Have you experienced this with a friend?  Which role did you play in the miscommunication/misunderstanding?  Was it resolved?  If so, how?

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