Ever since the book came out, I've received feedback about how it's made women think about friendships throughout their lives, as well as who is in their lives now. The goal of this blog is to open up and create a dialogue about friendships: the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Each week I will post my thoughts, experiences, as well as various articles, topics or quotes that I feel are important when examining female friendships. Please feel free to leave comments; I look forward to hearing from you!

Email me: survivingfemalefriendships@gmail.com

Follow me: https://www.facebook.com/Surviving-Female-Friendships-839907162798307/?ref=hl https://twitter.com/ZangaraNicole

Monday, January 14, 2013

Friendships That Pick Up Without a Hitch

I spent the holidays with family friends I hadn't seen in years.  As children, my parents, brothers and I would take vacations with this family who lived in another state; it was fun to share many experiences together.  I refer to the parents as my "aunt" and "uncle" and always felt close to the five siblings.  As we grew older, we drifted apart - not uncommon when everyone lives in different locations - and so I'd get updates on Facebook or from my parents as to the whereabouts and news about all of the grown children.

Therefore, when an opportunity presented itself over the holidays to celebrate one of the son's and one of the daughter's wedding engagements, I couldn't pass it up to see them.  Talk about picking up right where we left off so many years ago!  We were laughing, re-telling stories, as well as creating new memories and experiences that will, I'm sure, be told again when we're all together.  We also watched old videos of family vacations...gotta love fanny packs and clothes of the 80s!

It's these friendships that are amazing because you can't explain why or how they work - they just do.  There's a comfortable-ness (not sure that's a word, but I'll continue) and a feeling of connection that cannot be re-created in other friendships.  There's also history, which helps to move the friendships along.

I came back home with a sense of awe about these people and the positive benefits of good, healthy friendships.  Even though time will pass and we may not contact each other on a daily basis, I know these friendships are built on a solid foundation that only became stronger because of this trip.  

Have you experienced this phenomenon?  If so, how do you make sense of it?   


  1. As one of the parents in this family friend group, it is so very heart warming to me that the ability to pick up the relationships as if they had never been "interrupted" by time and space has transferred from one generation to the next. We (the "older adults") have always been blessed with that unique gift... and I treasure it. It is a wonderful feeling to know that we somehow bequeathed, facilitated or taught our children how to make those special connections themselves. Maybe it was the example we gave or perhaps the repetition of being together year after year for that special carefree family time of summer vacation. Whatever it is, I hope you will continue to keep that flame alive!

  2. It's hard to put my finger on what makes these sorts of friendships happen, but I have a similar thing with my ex-college roommates. No matter how long its been since I spoke to them, things pick right back up when we get together. The interesting thing is, even though the friendship remains the same this relationship seems to allow the friends to grow as individuals without weakening the friendship or familiarity.