Ever since the book came out, I've received feedback about how it's made women think about friendships throughout their lives, as well as who is in their lives now. The goal of this blog is to open up and create a dialogue about friendships: the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Each week I will post my thoughts, experiences, as well as various articles, topics or quotes that I feel are important when examining female friendships. Please feel free to leave comments; I look forward to hearing from you!

Email me: survivingfemalefriendships@gmail.com

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Monday, January 7, 2013

Holiday Gifts and Friendship

The holidays are over, which means that shopping malls are less crowded and there are no more holiday parties - phew!  Ugly sweater parties are not my cup of tea...but that's for another post.

Every year, we spend a ton of money on holiday gifts; gift giving is a holiday tradition and one that allows us to show our appreciation with (usually) material things.  Especially when it comes to our BFFs, we like to give and receive gifts to show how we feel about the friendship.

Some of you may be still going through all the gifts you received, and are deciding what to do with certain gifts that you're not too thrilled about - re-gifting, anyone?!  We've all been there: we've received a gift and even though our friend may think we'll like it, we don't.  It's awkward and sometimes you have to bite the bullet, smile and say you like it...when in fact, you don't. 

When we give someone a gift, we run the risk of the person not liking it.  And then it becomes a dilemma because no one wants to be honest - come on, do you really want to make your friend feel bad because you don't like the gift?  Then you're seen as selfish and rude.  Oy vey! 

However, some of you may feel as though you can be honest and tell your friend that you don't like the gift without causing a rift.  As for me, I'm too afraid even if I feel the friendship is secure; I'm scared of hurting the person's feelings, which would then make me feel even worse.  It's supposed to be the thought behind the gift - it's the thought that counts...right?!  So when I receive a gift I don't like, I find myself feeling more grateful for even getting a gift in the first place.  I think about how that friend put time, effort and thought into the gift, and that's what I focus on.  If I like the gift, then I consider that just fabulous!

Have you received a gift from a friend and lied about liking it?  What's the weirdest gift you've received from a friend?  What are your thoughts about holiday gift giving and friendship?


  1. I love your philosophy about being the gracious recipient of a gift you don't particularly care for. It's just nice to come across this and find out that there are still nice people out there who would never take a chance on hurting someone else's feelings. I'm probably so happy about it because that's the way I feel--always have! My mother taught me to be thankful that someone thought enough of me to buy me a gift, so that's what I try to focus on. I bought this book over the weekend (for my Nook) so I'm glad you also have this blog. So excited to read what you have to say about friendships (especially after this sweet post!).

    1. Thanks so much for your comments, Lorin! Hope you enjoy the book :-)

  2. I TOTALLY agree about ugly sweater parties, and I have an outfit I always wear to them that is not ugly with involves a white sweater, red leggings (that I got in a kids section), a reindeer headband and sparkly silver uggs. I once won second place in a contest with this outfit which was my ultimate revenge against the ugly sweater trend.

    Anyway, I don't do gifts with my friends anymore and I'm not too picky about gifts so I usually like most stuff. I usually think its the thought that counts like you said, so I probably wouldn't bother mentioning if I didn't like something :)

    1. Kelly,
      Sounds like you've mastered the ugly sweater parties!